5 Questions to Help You Defeat Powerlessness

One of the hardest things to do when we’re feeling overwhelmed, stressed, hopeless or depressed is see a way out of it. It’s easy to play the victim, wallow in self pity, and stop trying. We’ve all been there and we will all have our moments of feeling powerless in the midst of life’s challenges. However, Proverbs tells us that “Whoever has no rule over his own spirit is like a city broken down, without walls” (Proverbs 25:28). In other words, if your feelings rule you, you are leaving yourself open for attack from the enemy. God didn’t create you for powerlessness, self-pity, or to play the victim. He created you to be an overcomer, to reign in life, and to withstand the enemy’s attack. With the Holy Spirit we can overcome whatever life or the enemy throws at us - even our own inner struggles.

Here are five questions to help you overcome a victim mindset and defeat powerlessness in your life.

1) What is the problem and why is it a problem?

The problem is rarely what it seems to be on the surface. This question (in various forms) needs to be asked until we get to the root of our issue. Usually our initial indentifcation of the problem has a lot to do with why we’re wallowing in self-pity. Here is how this question might play out…

What is the problem? I’m a loser. I’m so far from where I should be at this point in life. Whenever I try something, I end up failing. I suck.

Why is that a problem? Because I don’t want to be a loser. I want to make a significant contribution to the world. I want to make the world a better place and influence people towards God.

So what is the real problem? I’m not making a significant contribution to the world.

And why is that a problem? Because I was created to influence people towards God.

This of course could lead to a conversation about what keeps you from making a significant contribution which helps to reveal the limiting beliefs we must overcome. For example, maybe in my heart I believe I will always fail and so I’m not really trying or giving the opportunities I have to influence people the time it takes to come to fruition. I will be talking about limiting beliefs in a future post. For now, the goal of this question is to move you away from self-pity towards personal responsibility, which leads to the question…

2) What is your responsibility?

There are a lot of things in this world I can’t control, but we can’t use that as an excuse to not rule over what we are responsible to control - ourselves. Our attitudes, our mindsets, our behaivors. After trying very unsucessfully to cheer someone up a few years ago I had a revelation - I can’t make people happy. Not even those closest to me. Their happiness is not my responsibility. My responsibility is to love people and treat them with honor. Whether or not they’re happy is entirely up to them. In the scenario I started above…

I can’t control whether or not people will be open to the gospel, or allow me to influence them towards God. What I can control is my own determination to never give up, to look for opportunities to influence people to God, and to make the most of every opportunity through the empowerment of the Holy Spirit.

3) What have you done that has worked?

While it’s possible to learn from what has worked for others, start with what works for you. This has been important for me as little by little I’ve learned to adapt a healther relationship with food and exercise. I may not be in the shape I want right now, but some things have worked for me. I have pretty succesfully eliminated overly sugary foods from my diet. I’m going to keep doing that and get even better at it as I look to find other changes that will work for me.

Ok - so maybe I’m not Billy Graham and I haven’t contributed anything that feels significant. But I have gotten really good at loving people and seeing the good in them even when they don’t see it in themselves. That has been really significant for the people in my life.

4) What are your options?

This might be a good one to get some help with. Stress tends to give us tunnel vision and someone outside the problem might have a better perspective. He or she should also be willing to confront pride or fear that would otherwise keep you from considering all your options. For example, maybe a good option for you is to talk to a Christian Counselor or maybe you need to stop watching a t.v. show that feeds your dark side. Proverbs 27:6 tells us that “Wounds from a friend can be trusted…” and this is a good time to let your true friends be honest with you and heed their advice.

Option #1: Keep feeling like a loser

Option #2: Stop caring at all about making positive difference and just live for myself

Option #3 Focus on loving the people around me and making a significant contribution to their lives.

Wow, I feel powerful already! Look at all those options. Ok, in this instance there is only one good option but in the complexity of real life there probably is more than one option for you moving forward. Let those who love you the most help you weigh the pros and cons and then make a decision…

5) What are you going to do? or better yet…

What does God want you to do?

On my computer monitor I have a sticky note that says, ”Obedience is my responsiblity. The outcome is God’s responsiblity.” This would be a good time to pray and ask the Lord what his desire is for you and commit to moving forward on the path He has for your life, trusting that when you are obedient to him, he takes care of your problems, stressors, and the enemy coming against you.

I’m going to love people and trust God with the outcome of my life!